The comfort zone
The term comfort zone is a term I read and hear a lot; you see so many posts pointing to getting out of the comfort zone as the solution to every problem in life, the way to find oneself and one’s bliss.
The fact is that the comfort zone is almost always characterised by so much negativity. And leaving the comfort zone is many people’s LEITMOTIV (guiding theme).
The Comfort Zone theory was developed in 2009 by Alasdair White, a business management theorist, to identify how a company’s employees could maximise their work performance through a low-stress level.
Brenè Brown defines the comfort zone as that condition “where insecurity, scarcity and vulnerability are at a minimum. We believe we have access to a sufficient amount of love, food, talent, time, and admiration. Where we feel we can exercise some control”.
Building a whole and satisfying life is a pursuit that is not achieved by changing a few habits, changing jobs or abandoning an emotional relationship. Instead, this journey is much more challenging and starts from a knowledge of oneself, of one’s weaknesses and imperfections, but also one’s resources and real needs.
We come into the world endowed with our natural background and perceptiveness to the environment. During our personal development and experiences, we structure and shape ourselves until we build our representation of ourselves, others and the world. Much of our psychological balance is due to this complex system of perception and processing.
To remain emotional stable, it is necessary to develop an ever-increasing capacity to become aware and conscious of what each person feels and thinks, to observe one’s emotional reactions, to understand which things make us feel good, which things frighten, shame or anger, and which experiences lead one to behave in a certain way and make confident decisions.
On our pathway to personal growth, the support of a therapist or coach could be aimed at encouraging a new reading of the way we perceive and think about reality, intending to promote the change necessary to succeed in feeling well.
So often, the fear of asking for help originates from the idea of seeing one’s vulnerability, one’s limitation, reflected in another person’s eyes. However, asking for help could be the first step in turning fear into courage and realising change.
Marcel Proust said: “The true journey of discovery does not consist in seeking new lands, but in having new eyes”.